STOP JUDGING: 3 reasons to recognize and release judgments

stop judging others

Judging others is part and parcel of what it means to be a human being. We all do it. Most often, we do it subconsciously.

But, as all human behaviour has a reason and a function, what is the function of judging others? Why do we judge people, things and situations, and why should we overcome it?

3 main reasons why we judge

To feel better about ourselves

The most obvious reason people judge others is to feel better about themselves. It is a psychological tactic that works, even if the people we judge are absent. For instance, when we feel bad about ourselves, and can criticize others for, say, being overweight, we can feel ‘better’ than them. When we can see the ‘other’ as somehow inferior to us, we can feel superior—a tactic we only need if we feel small in some way to begin with.

When we are at ease with who we are, we feel no need to criticize others. But when we feel we’re not good enough in some way, we can push those feelings away by seeing another as inferior to ourselves.

This tactic will never bring true happiness and self-acceptance. We will need to be constantly judging others in order to maintain our superiority. That way, we’ll never explore the parts of ourselves we feel inferior about and heal them. We’ll remain stuck, instead of growing into the whole beings we were supposed to be.

To disown parts of ourselves we view as negative

This reason is closely connected to the first one. Usually, when people feel small and not good enough, those feelings have been instilled in them at some earlier stage. We are not born into this world feeling bad about ourselves—we get told we are bad or not good enough and start to believe it.

We are not born into this world feeling bad about ourselves—we get told we are bad or not good enough and start to believe it.

Judging often starts with being judged in early life. When we push away the parts of us that were judged, and start judging others for them instead, we project the parts of us that were hurt onto them. We can distance ourselves from our pain this way, but we can never heal and grow.

The same goes for shadow projection, where we see what we weren’t allowed to be, do or feel in early life, and notice the exaggerated version of that in another and judge them for it. For instance, if we weren’t allowed to express ourselves freely, when we see someone who takes centre stage, even exaggerating to be heard, we can feel disproportionally irritated or angry and judge them as being obnoxious.

To push what we fear out of our conscious experience

This one is a little more complex. Sometimes, when we have been hurt by a certain kind of person, in a certain kind of situation, we can start judging everyone who seems to share the same characteristics. We do this to keep them at arm’s length and stave off the doubts about our own worth that they instilled in us.

This is the kind of judging that you often see with victims of any kind of abuse and aggression. People who share the same demographic, the same rude behaviour or even the same gender as the perpetrator can be perceived as hostile, bad and dangerous—and then they’re judged and kept away.

We use this strategy when we have hurt and trauma deep inside of us that has not healed yet. We are afraid that if we stop judging people who remind us of the original perpetrator and accept them as they are, or at least accept that they exist, we’re somehow saying the perpetrator’s behaviour was OK.

Abuse is never OK. When someone abuses us, in whatever way, their behaviour is wrong. They are crossing our boundaries and they are responsible for it.

If we feel the need to constantly criticize a certain group of people or type of behaviour, it may be time for some soul-searching. We may need to look for the real reason we don’t want to allow a certain type of person to be as they are, so that we can allow ourselves to be just as we are.

Releasing judgments and the need to judge

woman writing word 'don't on windowWhy is this good for us?

Judging diminishes us and our experience

Judging others, things, situations, feelings and ideas creates polarity. We label something or someone as ‘bad’ in some way or another, and distance ourselves or even place ourselves above it.

That means we exclude that which we judge from our experience. We create a split in our reality. Not only does this make our world smaller, it also diminishes us, because more often than not, what we judge represents an aspect of ourselves (good or bad). This is often an aspect that needs to be brought to light and healed.

Judging costs valuable life energy

Fear, anger, shame and guilt are the feelings most associated with that which we judge and disown, disavow or push away. These are powerful feelings that need to be examined. When we do examine them, we will discover that they are connected to important parts of our subconscious selves that will yield treasures when reclaimed.

When we heal the parts of us that were made to feel ashamed, guilty, afraid or angry, we release them and bring them into the light of consciousness. Fear, anger and shame will melt away and make way for love, renewal, gratitude, peace and acceptance.

Releasing judgment brings wholeness

When we continue to push the repressed parts of us away, it costs us valuable life energy. When we reclaim those parts and bring them to light, we find they were never really bad to begin with, and we bring ourselves and our world a step closer to wholeness.

«RELATED READ» WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY: Perspective is everything»

Wendy Gillissen, M.A. is a psychologist, past-life therapist and the author of the award-winning spiritual adventure Curse of the Tahiéra. She lives and works in the Netherlands. In her spare time, she likes to play the Celtic harp. You can also find her on Facebook.

image 1 Pixabay 2 Pixabay 3 Pixabay

The Tragedy Of Not Living Your Purpose

First, let me explain my introduction to the usage of the imagination, in real time. As a child, I grew up in neighborhoods where people never reached their full potential. I grew up in areas where there were children given a most tragic hand, which revealed a 99% chance of not seeing anyone in their family live out anything that resembled full potential, as an example to follow.

SEE ALSO: 5 Ways To Shift Your Mood


I had and still have, hard-working parents who taught and pushed my sister and I, to be all that we were capable of being and to believe that we could achieve such feats of miracle. I watched my mother and father live in conditions that were not the best and gradually move my sister and I into much more favorable, physically appealing circumstances, as their jobs and the accompanying salaries, simultaneously improved. I remember moving from a small one-bedroom apartment as a five-year-old, to a two-bedroom apartment as an eight-year-old, to a three-bedroom house when I was 12 years old.

With each move, I had the pleasure of observing the physical representation of talks my mother and father would have, about moving to a better place and of my sister and I having our own bedrooms. I witnessed the imaginations of my parents take physical form. With each move, I observed a remarkable change in the physical appearance of the grass in front of homes, the cleanliness of the neighborhoods and most importantly, the physical appearance and mental demeanor of the people who lived in each area. The physical beauty of a neighborhood and the pride of the people in that neighborhood go hand-in-hand. I have had the learning experience and the pleasure of seeing such beauty during my youthful developmental years, based upon the choice of utilizing the imagination.

The essence of the problem

Now, what does all of that have to do with the tragedy of not living one’s full potential or more bluntly, living out one’s purpose? I compare living out a purpose, with the ultimate form of expression and rebellion, simultaneously. Can you image it? Can you imagine the audacity of a person believing they deserve better in life, to have a vision, to ignore any size group of people who refuse to see what they see? This group could include family members, friends and neighbors and then for the individual to actually live out what they wanted? Wow! That is what my parents did!

However, as a 45-year-old man, I recently drove through those old streets where I used to live as a small child. I waved and spoke to familiar faces and I spoke to elderly people who actually seemed quite old when I was a youngster. I saw new children on new playgrounds in front of old conditions that refused to change with time. I witnessed people who had no hope, no ambition, no plan, barely living from day to day and who clearly could care less about contemplating the concept of a purpose.

Under such conditions of the physical and the mental, such thoughts are a rarity anyway. When people cannot see past daily survival, how could they be free to pursue a purpose or utilize their imagination to create a better way of life? Yet, there is always a handful of people within those circumstances that will utilize creativity and the mind to engineer a better way of life. I saw apartment buildings and houses that looked extremely dingy or boarded up. Life, love, and families overcome by years of self-neglect, in the form of generations of adults, who could not muster the audacity to live up to their full potential. I saw cars parked in front of homes that clearly had not moved in forward or reverse in years.

The missing hubcaps, decaying paint jobs and spider webs underneath the cars, serving as analogies for the trap or deceitful practice of attempting to copy the success of someone else, rather than to examine and fortify the unique success that lies within.

The more things change, the more they stay the same

In my retreat from such harsh reminders of unfulfilled potential, to the undeniably robust areas of the city that I enjoyed as a teenager and young adult, I found more tragic reminders that revealed material gain cannot escape the clutches of universal law. The flash of vehicle brands such as Mercedes Benz, BMW, Infinity, Ferrari, Cadillac, KIA, and Toyota within the confines of upscale malls, 5-star restaurants, and organic grocery stores, could not hide undeniable truths. Truths that reveal the bondage of upper middle class and generational wealth.

Expectations, hold people hostage, that is, the pressure of living up to the expectations of other people, when those expectations are centered only on material gain, with the blatant disregard to mental, spiritual and emotional development. The attending of the latest yoga franchise class alone, will not mend the emotional wounds that exist outside of those studio doors. As a teen I used to visit friends in their upscale neighborhoods and pass by liqueur stores, seeing patrons walk out clutching their “brown bag of hope”. A similar sight in low-income neighborhoods. I used to wonder, “Why would someone who has an expensive car and lives in this neighborhood have a need for a “brown bag?” Growing up, I learned that the “brown bag” represented problems that only a bottle could solve, or so the holder of the bottle thought.

Having observed wealth while living in the United States and in the United Arab Emirates, I have witnessed firsthand the glow of wealth at its greatest levels. Yet, with that wealth, I have witnessed the ultimate in self-hate, disillusionment, and unfulfilled potential.

The moment of truth

What is potential? The etymological dictionary defines potential as “that which is possible” and more importantly “power, might, and force”. When you align yourself with your purpose, you align yourself with the power of “all that is”, that which created you. You then re-align yourself to get back on track to do what you were born to do with force! With that being said, never securing the personal freedom to mentally step back and examine life, for fear of not moving along with the crowd, is tragic. Never having the bravery to sit and be alone, to contemplate a change, which will result in a new course in life, is tragic. Always doing what someone else wants you to do because you are afraid that they will no longer embrace you, is tragic.

Fear of raising topics among friends or family that could spark a much-needed conversation and resolution to an ongoing problem is tragic. Fear of pursuing a certain type of job, becoming a professional artist, moving to a new city, moving out of the old neighborhood, leaving an unfulfilling dead-end relationship, becoming an entrepreneur, learning a new skill, telling someone “NO”, only drinking alcohol or using drugs because your friends do it, are all examples of TRAGIC circumstances. Circumstances that distract people from living out their PURPOSE.

The etymological definition of purpose is defined as an intention, aim or goal, and more importantly, a purpose reveals ones unique “design”. Yet, most people are too “busy” to think, to consider such thoughts. Nevertheless, the decision has to be made, now or in the future. This moment of truth is taking place right now in every urban, suburban and rural landscape in the world. Look in the mirror and ask yourself “Am I going to live an unfulfilled life or am I going to enjoy the freedom of living out my purpose.” “Am I going to have peace every moment of my life or live a hellish life of my own making?”

Tragedy or Victory, which one will it be?

Dr. Christiane Northrup Tells All About Her 40-Day Love Crystal Ritual

For nearly 30 years, Dr. Christiane Northrup, worked as an obstetrician gynecologist, helping women to conceive, deliver and maintain their reproductive health. Then, she made a switch.

“Having been board-certified in everything that can go wrong with the female body, I decided to spend the rest of my life teaching women everything that can go right,” Christiane told me.

Christiane Northrup has written 8 books on everything from embracing menopause to discovering your inner radiance. Her breakout bestseller Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom, empowered women to take charge of their health through enhancing the mind, body and spirit. But in spite of all this success and people like me as adoring fans, Christiane felt there was something missing in her love life.

“I’ve never had a truly conscious, equal partnership,”Christiane said. “I was divorced after 24 years of marriage. Then I had a love affair with a man who could never quite commit because his business, his mother, or his daughter always came first.”

“I would say to you, my entire life, ‘Work is easy. Writing books is easy. Where the hard work has been is being one on one in a relationship,” she explained. “To be consciously met in relationship has been my driving force. It’s been the source of the deepest longing, grief, and yearning in my entire life. It was just like, ‘Oh my god, when is this going to happen?’”

I know for a lot of women, this is sounding familiar. Because you can work on building up your career and you can even work on yourself, but when it comes to love, it doesn’t work the same way. Christiane had done eHarmony, she dated, and she even learned argentine tango.

“I did everything one does,” she told me.

“After my divorce, my intent was to become the kind of woman that the man I was seeking would be attracted to. And that’s typical, old soul empath behavior. Thinking that we’re inferior and always have to work on ourselves.”

Before Crystal Muse was released, the publisher sent Christiane a copy of the manuscript, since she has also published with them.

“When I received the pages of your book from Hay House [Publishing], I saw the love ritual in there, and it spoke to me,” Christiane told me. “It spoke to me, not because I thought it would make anything happen, I just thought it would make something welcome.”

She started it in the new moon of cancer on June 23. She didn’t have everything that she needed on hand, but, as she told me, “I have a will of iron!”

“I got everything to together,” she said. “I did my detox bath with the coffee, I had my pink candles, and since I was traveling a lot during this time, I even had a little travel kit, with the rose essential oil, my pink candles and healing crystals.”

I admit, one of my favorite things to hear about are all the creative ways people figure out to make the ritual work with their hectic lives.

“One time, I did the ritual in the tailgate of my car as I was leaving my friend’s home,” Christiane said laughing. “It was like burning through every bit of resistance.”

But it was on a visit to her hometown that the real healing began. Going back to her childhood home during the ritual helped Christiane to see what had created the patterns within her.

“I am the black sheep on steroids in my family,” she explained. “If you were not an Olympic athlete, you were nothing. Playing the harp, getting straight A’s, going to medical school, all that counted for nothing.”

She realized that always trying to be good enough for her family had created a negative self-worth pattern in her love life.

“I have been like a moth to the flame of fixer-uppers that I couldn’t save for my whole life,” she said.

By confronting those patterns, she was able to begin reworking them into patterns that better served her.

“I finished the 40 days, and it was as if layers and layers and layers of stuff went away,” Christiane said. “I just loved doing it, but I still never really expected anything to happen.”

Two months after the ritual, Christiane received a message from a man who she had previously dated and loved, but who the timing was never quite right with. They started talking, then dating, and have been happily in love ever since!

“Now, was that because of the ritual? We will never know!” Christiane said, laughing. “But when you asked me to discuss this, the joy that I felt while doing the ritual…the whole thing was such a container for me. It was a container that forced me to focus on love everyday, for 40 days.”

“I’ve always known that I would be partnered, somehow. But I knew it would only happen—this is the way the world works—once I didn’t need it,” Christiane told me. “I think the ritual was 40 days of concentrating on the moment. The end was a marker of: I no longer require anything outside myself to make this happen.”

I wanted to share Christiane’s story because, as women, what really talks to our souls is when other women are honest, vulnerable and willing to share the good as well as the trials. We’re all here to learn. Hearing stories like this helps us to recognize that we’re not alone in our challenges. I love hearing Christiane be authentic about trying so many different things to grow, because I’m the same!

And you know what? I love a good success story.  

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 8 of Crystal Muse

This week we’re talking about matters of the heart. If you’ve been reading along with us on our summer book series, you know that we’re up to The Love Guru chapter of Crystal Muse. This chapter covers every phase of the heart’s journey. From self-love and new love, to setting intentions for lasting marriages and reigniting the flame. There’s even advice on how to heal the broken heart by working through it with rainbow obsidian. If you’re ready to get realigned with what makes your heart sing, let’s dive into our discussion of the love chapter!

When Heather was toying around with energetic formulas for love when she stumbled upon a winning combination. Not only is it how she attracted her own husband, it’s how countless others have met their soulmates as well. The idea behind the 40 day love ritual that she curated, is that you have to shift your perspective and breakthrough negative patterns in order to transform your love life. This means something different to every person going through the experience. Some people need to come to understand that the person they most need to focus on loving is themselves. And others need to shift away from always seeking out the wrong kind of person. That’s why Rose quartz and malachite play such essential roles in this ritual. Malachite is to help you see the harsh truths about the changes you need to make. The motivational energy of this stone also helps you to summon the courage to make those difficult shifts. Combining the energy of malachite with the loving and soothing energy of rose quartz provides the perfect balance of seeing what you need to fix, and seeing all that you have to love about yourself. Rose quartz is like an energetic hug. It’s energy opens your heart up to experience life’s joys through a happier and healthier lens. And when you vibrate out happiness, you attract it in return.

Now, a question for you: What’s a pattern or block that you need to break in your love life? Share with us and comment below!

How you take care of yourself says everything about the priority you place on your spiritual and emotional health. Don’t skimp on the self-love, or you’ll feel the impact in other areas of your life. Co-author, Timmi Jandro’s, story is interesting because it highlights two different ways in which you can neglect your self-love. The less-obvious method of doing this happens when you begin living your life for someone else. Timmi felt she was living like she was supposed to, so for years, she didn’t pause to consider if this was actually what she actually wanted. When it finally hit her that her life wasn’t fulfilling her core needs, she did a complete 180 degree turn. She went from a Norman Rockwell-esque domestic life to a no holds barred party life. This is the obvious form of self-care neglect. She was going out all the time and not investing any energy into her spiritual needs. After getting burnt out by this lifestyle, Timmi recognized that she needed to realign with true herself. But figuring out who exactly that was, and what she really wanted was no easy task. She needed a massive dose of self-love healing.

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 8 of Crystal Muse

Another question for you: What do you do when you need to get back into harmony with yourself? Share with us and comment below! 

Sustaining long-term relationships with others requires the same about amount of honesty and constant recommitment as your relationship with yourself. If your romantic relationship has been running on empty, refill the love with an infusion of rejuvenating energy. That means practicing respect, gratitude and authentic communication. The Keeping the Love Alive Ritual uses kambaba jasper and rhodonite to inspire these practices. The yin and yang balance of rhodonite’s calming energy with kambaba jasper’s creative stimulation will establish a perfect bond between the duel needs of a partnership.

Another question for you: What energy does your partnership needs more of? Share with us and comment below! 

When it comes to healing the heart, a lot of self-reflection is necessary. Rainbow obsidian is the stone Heather recommends because it forces you to dig deep and recognize the lessons you were meant to learn from that relationship. Ask yourself what life has taught you from this experience.

Last question for you: What’s your go-to crystal for healing your broken heart? What’s an important lesson that you learned from a past relationship? Share with us and comment below! 

Next up: We’ll be diving into chapter 10 to learn how to use crystals for a better night sleep.

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 10 of Crystal Muse

Have you been reading along with us on our journey through Crystal Muse? If so, you know that we’re setting our sights on dreamland this week for our discussion chapter 10, “Sweet Dreams.”

Not getting enough sleep at night can wreak havoc on your life. Being exhausted is a bit like being hungry, it turns you into someone you’re not—irritable and unable to focus. But being hungry is a quick fix, whereas being unable to sleep can be a frustrating and difficult problem to solve. It’s easy to overlook what a blessing a restful night’s sleep is, until you can’t seem to get one.  

Even if you’re sleeping, an important question to ask yourself is, “Do I feel emotionally and physically refreshed in the morning?”  If the answer is no, why not? Where is that block stemming from? These are the questions (and answers) that we find in chapter 10.

Now, a question for you: Do you have electronics or mirrors in your bedroom? What Feng Shui sleep faux pas do have in your room? Share with us and comment below!

For those who don’t chronically suffer from insomnia, and have only hit a recent stint of it, you may need to get realigned within your space. When Heather was hit with a series of sleepless night, seemingly out of nowhere, she realized that she needed to get out of her thought cycle, and ground her spirit back into her body. So, she cooked up a crystal recipe for calm alignment that included a lot of heavy hitting stones.

Stones for Grounding the Body:

Another question for you: When your mind gets flighty before sleep, what do you do to settle it down? Share with us and comment below! 

If it’s emotional or physical pain that’s keeping you awake, then you need to dig into the root of that problem. Of course, that’s easier said than done. Some roots aren’t that hard to find. Stress at work, physical ailments, arguments with your loved ones—these are issues near to the surface. It takes more work to get to the roots that you’ve buried deep. These are the ones anchored in your childhood, hurt from toxic relationships, lack of confidence, and so on. All of these roots can be destructive if you don’t deal with them. Lack of sleep is just one way they can manifest into a problem in your life.

To help you cope with physical pain, Heather recommends a shungite mat on the area because the antioxidants within this stone have anti-inflammatory qualities.

For releasing the emotional pain, Heather suggests working with apophyllite crystal for stress + anxiety relief, fluorite to assist with emotional healing, and an amethyst eye pillow to soothe and relax the body and mind. (Note: this is to shift you into a sleep state, but to fully release that pain, you’ll to need to engage in the kyanite cord cutting described in the next chapter.)

Another question for you: What is an issue that has been stressing you out? What do you do to relieve that stress before bed? Share with us and comment below! 

If you’ve been going in and out of sleep, there may be answers hidden within your tumultuous dreams. Heather suggests that journaling after sleeping with specific crystals can help you to remember what is bothering you in your sleep. The crystals for sleep she uses in her Drift Off to Dreamland Crystal Grid are:

Last question for you: Have you ever experienced an odd recurring dream, or nightmares that popped up during a stressful time in your life? Did you try journaling your dreams? Share with us and comment below! 

Next up: We’ll be diving into chapter 11 to learn how to cut energy cords.

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 11 of Crystal Muse

How are the Mars and Mercury retrogrades treating you? Remember, the trick to enhancing your life POST-retrograde is to take the time MID-retrograde to reflect, reevaluate, restructure, and renew. This isn’t the best time to sign contracts or launch into major projects. It is, however, a fantastic time to cleanse and cut out what isn’t serving your spirit.  As luck would have it, that’s exactly what we’re covering right now in our summer read through of Crystal Muse. This week’s chapter, Stop Sucking My Energy, is about learning how to locate and remove negative energy from your life.

The story that authors Heather Askinosie and Timmi Jandro used to explain energy cords was interesting because it shows that sometimes you need to cut the energy with someone you love—which doesn’t mean cutting contact. Instead, when you have a person, a situation at work or something else that leaves you feeling drained, even when you’re not around it, you need cut the energy cords to preserve your energy and your relationship with that thing.

On page 182, Heather defines energy cords as “the sharing of energy between two sources. It can also be thought of as the energy that connects two people. There cords can be positive when energy is shared equally, or negative when an imbalance occurs.”

An obvious instance of being energetically corded to someone is after a breakup. You know that feeling when you can’t stop thinking about someone, even though you know you’re better off without them? More often than not, that’s because you still share a cord to their energy. To get rid of this lingering energy connection that drains your energy, you can cut the cords using crystals.

Now, a question for you: What is something that you would like to cut the cords with right now? Share with us and comment below!

Black kyanite is the ultimate protective cleansing crystal because it shields your energy field from relationships or people who feast on your positive vibrations. By bringing your chakras into alignment, black kyanite brings your focus back to a positive frequency, and helps you to release imbalances.

Another stone for cleansing protection is black tourmaline. This crystal helps you to ensure that your whole home is shielded from outside negativity. Heather uses black tourmaline in each of the corners of a room to form a protection grid. She believes “this formation assists in balancing out the energy and dispelling the lower vibrations of a room.”

And for protection on the go, the recommended crystals to wear in this chapter were pyrite and black onyx. Black onyx shields from negative energy, psychic attacks, energy vampires and unwanted energy, while pyrite is both protective and positive, bringing in abundance, good luck and positive energy.

Another question for you: What are your go-to stones and methods for grounding yourself in protective energy? Share with us and comment below! 

Next up: We’ll be diving into chapter 12 to learn how to live in tune with the moon.

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 12 of Crystal Muse

The moon has a powerful influence over the earth and the human spirit. Its luminous draw has inspired wonder and awe in humans for as long as we have existed. With as busy as our lives get, we tend to align more with stress than with the simple pleasures of nature. Like us, the moon goes through cycles. It’s in a constant state of renewing its radiance. When we tap into that essence, we’re inspiring our soul to engage in a cycle of renewal as well. So any stress, hurt or outdated patterns we’ve invested in, can flow out with the tide as we bring in fresh positivity to manifest our dreams with. If you’ve been reading along with us in our journey through Crystal Muse, you know that we’re on chapter 12, Living in Tune With the Moon. So today’s discussion is all about setting intentions and embracing the nurturing vibrations of mother moon, for a more spiritually fulfilling life!

Being in tune with the moon and setting intentions with the phases of the moon is a powerful way to align with the universe. The new moon represents a new beginnings or a fresh start, making it the ideal time to start new projects and plant new seeds. The full moon is when the moon is at its peak brilliance, making it a powerful time for manifestations, making decisions and releasing. Create a regular monthly practice of setting new moon intentions and full moon intentions to stay in tune with the moon. Involve your friends and family and create a celebration atmosphere for your full moon or new moon ritual.

setting intentions in tune with the moon

If you want to learn more about setting intentions in accordance of the phases of the moon, check out this beautiful infographic by Ezzie Spencer, author of the book Lunar Abundance. You can use her guide when setting intentions for your healing crystals. Share this with all your moon-loving buddies and tag #lunarabundance!

Author, Heather Askinosie’s story about spending a year detoxing emotional and physical baggage through new moon purification ceremonies is definitely not something we can all relate to, but on a smaller scale, everyone can enjoy liberating their spirit and setting intentions for the future with the powerful energy of a new moon—no sweat lodge necessary! The stones highlighted in the mother moon mandala ritual are:

Labradorite is an especially essential stone when working with the moon’s energy because it helps you to tap into a higher state of consciousness. It boosts mental and spiritual power so that you can open the mind to see your true intentions, and pursue the solutions to your transformation.

Moonstone is another essential crystal to work with during new moon rituals because it helps you tap into your feminine energy, which is already enhanced during the new moon. The combination of these creative forces can inspire the birth of fresh perspectives, ideas, and motivation.

Now, a question for you: Where is your favorite spot for gazing at the moon? Share with us and comment below!

Setting intentions on the new moon enhances your manifestation energy. So if you’re already setting intentions, why not set aside an intention that you really want to focus on for the next new moon? As Heather put it, “Creating a regular practice of setting new moon intentions is a mindful way to commit to your dreams and goals. The crystals she recommends for new moon intention setting are:

Another question for you: What is an intention that you’d like to set on the next new moon? Share with us and comment below! 

If you don’t have a specific intention that you want to work on, and would rather use the new moon as a time to connect and relax with the earth and cosmos, then just do that! Rejuvenating the soul by bathing in healing moonlight can have an impact on your mood and focus in the days that follow. Surround yourself with crystals to deepen your cosmic connection. The stones Heather recommends having around you are:

  • Selenite—named after the greek goddess Selene, the goddess of the moon
  • Moonstone—to facilitate a deeper connection with the moon
  • Labradorite—to connect you with the energy of the universe and cosmos
  • Unakite—to balance masculine and feminine energies through the energy of love

Next up: We’ll be diving into chapter 13 to learn all about how to bring that creative spark back.

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 13 of Crystal Muse

As summer winds down, many of us tend to sink into the end-of-summer blues. To stave off these feelings, we need to infuse our spirit with passion and creativity. This helps us transition into fall with the welcoming embrace of what a new season brings in. Lucky for us, this coincides perfectly with our journey through Crystal Muse. If you’ve been reading along with us, you know that we’ve reached chapter 13, Your Creative Spirit. Let’s immerse ourselves into this chapter and get excited about sparking a fire within our spirit and imaginations!

Often, when we’re stuck in a creative rut, it affects several areas of our lives. You can’t have creativity without passion. So when our pool of passion becomes drained, there’s no way for our creativity to dive in and make a splash. Instead of trying to force your creativity to put out something, regardless of how uninspired you feel, you need to replenish your passion first.

For example, in Heather’s story about her looming deadline and creative block, sitting there staring at her project wasn’t an effective way to get inspired. By carrying around crystals to stimulate her heart chakra, her connection to the energy of creation and excitement was solidified. She also learned that everything has to come in its own time. “Pushing harder to make things happen can sometimes take you farther from where you need to be,” Heather wrote.

The crystals for creativity that Heather recommends for opening up your heart to let passion flow in are:

  • Carnelian—for passion, creativity and joy
  • Rose Quartz—for opening the heart to unconditional love, because when you stop criticizing and doubting yourself, you’re free to just CREATE
Now, a question for you: Have you ever tried to force something to happen, and found that what you really needed was to just release your grip on the situation and let it come to you? Share with us and comment below!

Sometimes, our creative spirit begins to mimic our lives in general. If you find yourself unable to take even simple risks elsewhere in your life, how can you expect to your creativity to thrive? You need some excitement in your life to bring about a shift in your imagination. Heather suggests breaking free of the box you’ve been living in by literally tearing apart a box.

If your spirit is going to mimic your stagnant actions, then let it instead copy this shift as you break the box. Obviously the ritual goes a bit deeper than that, including crystal intention setting and getting clear on the negative notions clouding your creative flow, but the idea of turning that analogy on its head to make it for you is one we really like.

Another question for you: What is a comfort zone that you’re due to break out of? Share with us and comment below! 

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 13 of Crystal Muse

Of course, you can’t go wrong when choosing to tap into your sense of play. If what you really want is to just shake things up for yourself and to have fun doing it, then Heather suggests you need crystals like:

Last question for you: What’s one fun thing that you can do to engage your sense of play today? Share with us and comment below! 

Next up, we’re reading chapter 14, The Now of Spirituality. Continue onto this chapter to get acquainted with how to embrace light and dark along your spiritual journey. It’s the last chapter of our summer read-through of Crystal Muse, so don’t miss our discussion about staying grounded even after our experience with the book comes to an end.  

Summer Reads: An Inside Look into Chapter 14 of Crystal Muse

Summer has come to an end, and, sadly, so has our summer read-through of Crystal Muse. But even though we’ve finished reading the book, your journey with it has only just begun. What rituals were you most excited to try while reading about them? These are the ones to return to when you decide it’s time to take your crystal practice to the next level. The final chapter that we’re discussing today is how to carry on with a positive spirit during every aspect of your life experience—even when it seems impossible to do so.

Having a spiritual connection to the earth is easy enough when things are going well in your life, but it’s when things take a chaotic turn that making time to ground yourself in calm, stabilizing energy becomes a challenge; and ironically, that’s when you need your spiritual practice most. That’s where the Ho’oponopono practice comes in. Author, Heather Askinosie, learned this practice from a Hawaiian medicine woman. The practice is a way to clean up and correct any problems in your life through forgiveness. As you forgive others, you forgive yourself.

The stones that Heather has included into her Ho’oponopono practice are all about cleansing and grounding. She recommends using:

  • Black Onyx—to release unwanted energies
  • Red Jasper—for stability and nurturing
  • Smoky Quartz—to ground and let go
  • Shungite—to neutralize any energy that’s released throughout the duration of the ritual

Red Jasper is one of the stones to bring with you when you feel tested by the universe. When everything seems to be going wrong and you can’t catch your breath in between solving one problem and a new problem arises—seek the stabilizing energy of red jasper. Even just holding a red jasper stone in your hands for a few moments of deep breathing can have a significant impact on shifting your spiritual state and mental perspective. Red jasper is works to dim constant worry, and links with the root and sacral chakra to lend the balance and motivation to get you through difficult times.

Now, a question for you: What is something/someone that you’d like to send forgiveness to? Share with us and comment below!

A lot of people make the mistake of thinking that when you embark on a spiritual journey, you’re trying to rid yourself of your shadow side. In reality, you’ll never completely rid yourself of that part of you. It’s an aspect of the human condition. Instead, you need embrace the shadow side. Through learning to understand and forgive the darkness within, we can let these emotions surface so that they can be released. Constantly being aware of your shadow side, and taking the time to heal things as they arise, keeps you from becoming overwhelmed by negativity. To do this healing, the stones used in Heather’s Opening Your Heart to Your Shadow Ritual are:

  • Rhodonite—for forgiveness, compassion and releasing fear
  • Shungite—for neutralizing any energy that’s released during the duration of the ritual
  • Ruby Zoisite—for transmuting negative energy into positive
  • Rose Quartz—for opening the heart to unconditional love
  • Selenite—for light energy
  • Black Tourmaline—for clearing and releasing energy
Another question for you: What is an element of your shadow side that you normally repress, but that are willing to heal? Share with us and comment below! 

As Heather put it, once you’ve “connected your body with your heart, you’ll need to expand your mind, uniting all three.” Take time after you’ve finished reading the book to be still, and consider what ideas and thoughts can inspire new growth in your life. Clear quartz and lemurian seed quartz are what Heather recommends doing this exercise with. These crystals together can help you to expand beyond your current limiting beliefs.    

Which rituals have you not been able to stop thinking about? Your intuition is letting you know where it wants to go. Are you going to follow?  

Now that you’ve finished your journey through the book:

Leave a review on Amazon :: We could really use your help in our goal of reaching 1,000 reviews on Amazon. If you have a minute, please click here and submit a review.

Have you completed a crystal ritual from the book? Share your experience with us :: Take a few minutes to fill out this form so we can learn more about your crystal experience. We’re looking for members of our crystal community who are willing to do an interview with to share their transformations and breakthroughs.

Crystals for Truth: Clear Your Mind to Speak Your Truth

Is your natural instinct to avoid confrontation? If so, you’re not alone. Many perceive addressing their issues with others as a way of inciting conflict. In reality, the more we hold onto our emotions, the greater the conflict becomes. Bottling up your frustrations can’t resolve them. It only stalls the resolution, allowing for the problem to escalate internally in the meantime. That’s why learning to speak your truth is so crucial to your mental health and spiritual progress. Rather than giving someone a piece of your mind in an aggressive way, you can give them a piece of your heart by articulating your vulnerability. Connecting with the energy of healing crystals for truth will open up the throat chakra. Crystals for communication are a great way to get over the fear and hesitation that’s keeping you quiet. When we know we should communicate our feelings, but are too afraid to stir the pot, it’s often because of an energy block in our throat chakra.

Energy blocks can result from a negative self-image, past experiences and many other underlying issues. Working with healing crystals for truth can benefit your spirit by gently guiding you to reflect and assess these issues.

The more you grant yourself the confidence, compassion and respect to feel that your emotions are valid, the more empowered you’ll feel to address them. This ritual for speaking your truth uses crystals for conscious communication to help you be candid with yourself and others. We’ve all experienced a time when we neglected to resolve a problem with someone, allowed our feelings about the issue to build, and wound up exploding on them later about something insignificant that was really about the initial problem we had. Checking in with yourself through this easy ritual with healing crystals for truth will help you to release steam, and find a thoughtful way to express your feelings as they arise.

For this ritual, you’ll need one of the following healing crystals for truth: azurite, aqua aura quartz, celestite, lapis lazuli or amazonite. These crystals for communication are important for soothing the anxiety that builds before confrontation. Working with honesty crystals can reframe your perception away from finger pointing, so that you can express yourself in a calm, concise and compassionate way.

A Ritual to Help You Speak Your Truth

What you’ll need:

  • your favorite blue gemstone (i.e. azurite, aqua aura quartz, celestite, lapis lazuli or amazonite)
  • a piece of paper + pen

Speak Your Truth Ritual Steps:

  1. The best way to speak your truth with others is to practice with yourself first. Give yourself 30 minutes in the morning to do this ritual. Start by grabbing a pen, a piece of paper and your chosen crystal.
  2. In your non-writing hand, hold your crystal, and then, begin free writing. Write down all of the things going on in your head. Don’t think, don’t critique—just write. Clear your inner dialogue. Get rid of the judgements, and tap into your stream of consciousness. Write until all your thoughts are out, and you’ve filled up the page.
  3. Rip the paper up. Don’t save it. This isn’t a journal that you’ll look back on to gain perspective. This is a practice in release, being honest, and getting your thoughts out without hesitating or holding back. Throw the pieces of the paper in the trash. When you do this, it clears the mind of things you just needed to put out there. It can help to cleanse you of the angry, bitter or petty emotions, so that you can approach the rest of the day from a more elevated, clear and calm state of expression. Do this a few times a week, and see if you feel the difference! It opens you up to be able to speak your truth.